Where to go

As usual, if you want to see all the pics, clothing,  and personal stuff, regularly updated. Go to http://torlilah.tumblr.com/

Rant

I am positively intolerant of emo-victims.

You know those people who wine about “their lot” or sit on their hands and watch their life go down the pisser without trying to take control.

Those people who bleet on about their failed romances, the one who got away, but who either string several along at the same time or give everything up straight away because of course it’s love, he said so!

Seriously, friend or foe, you need a fucking slap! I read on a competition column for a website two friends of mine, had entered, some person bleating on about their negative past life (not in a “i used to be Mary Queen of Scots sense”. On a fashion website.

Seriously since when did your situation become note worthy? Do you think people going to a fashion website want to know about your lot?What exactly do you hope to achieve apart from a pity party. How about you focus on the positive and not the negative! Isn’t that a much nicer way to get peoples attention. To share love, optimisim and hope?

We all go through ups and downs, we get hurt, we repair ourselves, we are then meant to move on. If your life has gone to the shitter, perhaps you didn’t take care of yourself? Perhaps you let yourself down? If that’s the case, how is a one man pity-party going to help?

TAKE CONTROL. For the love of anything sacred, do something productive and don’t bleet about it to everyone like some visceral haemorrhage.

If your life doesn’t go the way you want it, like most, so what, your values, expectations and desires will have changed since your career session at high school.

Just stay away from social networking and forums and let us read in to our interests in peace. If we want to know about injustice, misfortune and despair, an employed woman, with 3 children in her 40’s, in a relationship, living in a rich country with state healthcare and who can afford a computer and Internet connection is not really symbolic of the horror that this world sees, is it?

Be quiet, be positive, conduct your personal life, personally, be a role model for your children, work hard and laugh harder.

Vanity is our greatest downfall, and those with the least in this world are normally the most content and the most beautiful for it.

Tastes like chicken...

Do you ever sit there and think about the things in your life that piss you off. That make you sad, or question the purpose of getting up in the morning?

Yes?

Well what are you going to do about it?

What will you change, or introduce to bring about a happier life for yourself?

Lets face it, if you won’t sort your life out, no one else will. Don’t see why you need to change anything? Well, stop complaining and get used to being unfulfilled.

You don’t have much to offer a partner if you can’t look after yourself, if you are one of those people that think all you need is romantic love.

Nah, sod this imaginary romance malarky, plenty of time for that, once you have got yourself doing what you want to do. Provided the things for yourself that you want. Experienced, travelled, consumed, worn….  achieved by your own standards..

Then in 5 years, where do you want to be? What do you want to be doing.

You can’t guarantee you’ll be with them but if you want it bad enough, you can at least be there to meet them.

We have a plan, we have our research to do. Whether together or apart, we can both achieve it. So lets do it!

I’ll see you there!

Employ me, you know you want too!

5 job applications, 2 cv’s, one career change.

Why? The problem solving and rewards in the social support sector aren’t enough for me! I want to work to support those who want to help themselves and for a large majority of my clients over the last few years, it is often not this case.

So, knowing my strengths, weaknesses and skills, i’m taking my stride towards a vocation that most find boring, but I love!

It means a pay cut and more training/qualifications but as I’m the right side of 30, I don’t have a problem with that! Moving for me will literally be all change and I can’t wait!
Many people I know are at the stage of finding career work fe the first time outside of higher education and ate facing a whole heap of issues.

Too much competition, badly scripted application forms, boring CV’s, interview nerves or over confidence.

Do your best.. Not the sort of best your mum would except but is really a thinly veiled sludge of “I can’t be bothered”!

Sell yourself, your skills, attitude, enthusiasm and possibly body! If you don’t sizzle then a) it’s possibly not the right job for you and b) someone else will!
Be prepared, the boy scouts give sound advice, know your industry, learn about the company and keep to key information!
Lastly, know matter how many times u get passed over, man the **** up and keep trying!

Where have you been all my life...

… winning lottery ticket?
Indeed… where have you been as we still have not met! No, it wasn’t fortune that has kept me away. It was just silly little thing life chucks our way.
I’ve caught up with family, had an amazing time in Warwickshire getting to meet Tom’s nearest and dearest. Decided not to proceed with the purchase of our flat in Kent as it is clear where we want to be is up north, so why fight it?
My job continues to pay but doesn’t do anything to feed my soul. So, ALL CHANGE PLEASE!
I’ve had sewage flood in my basement. Discovered the existence of 1.8kg jars of Jelly Belly beans. Spent way to much on shoes and clothes. Bought a new laptop. Loads of baking and consumption of said baking. Gained about 7lbs. (back off feeders).
Dressed up like a Zebra, in public and my plce of work. Raised funds, spent funds. Made curry. Became an aunt for the 5th time. Lost friends. Made friends. Annoyed others. Oh and completed all but 2 achievements on Dragon Age 22 (Xbox live). 
Usual stuff.
I have a weekend in London seeing some genuinely decent bloody people who make me laugh if nowt else, i am sure i don’t return the favour, maybe i should try sexual suggestions? And have picked my outfit so i am sure i will be posting more fashion links for those interested.
In my recent shopping sessions i have noticed the distinct lack of decent fatty accessories, especially things like belts and decent wide shoes. If you have any great sites, please share! My vanity needs you!
Feed the love fattehs!

Off Duty Fatty

Normal ish from the front... size of a small car from the rear. 

Tumblr Photo set - BBW models

Are these women fat, curvy, normal....  .. or just women??

Tumblr Repost

I’m off for a week now, on Holiday with the Lord, to Europe to spend some time with my parents and won’t be back until the other side of V-day. 

It’s been a strange old week, had a few goodbyes to make and a few more hellos. My patience with people is at an all time low and this house buying malarky is utter maddness. Once i survive it.. IF i survive it i will post some helpful advice cos, bejesus, FTB’s need it and there is a massive lack of it out there.

Would you solely rely on the advice of someone who has their right hand stuck in your purses drawing out their fees? If u answered yes.. u may as well remove all the monies from the nearest atm and drop it on the ground!

Have a fun Valentines. Make your card, make a mix cd, crack open the wine and cook a nice meal for your other health. IE make an effort not just a quick launch down to the nearest Hallmarks where u feel u laboured over picking a card. Do something personal! 

If you’re single, don’t mope, get your girls round and have a love in. Or self love.. (no filth intended)  do all those things for urself and remember u are as amazing single as u are involved. A relationship doesn’t define you, just enchances u and it’s alright to wait for a good catch to come along. 

Kevin Smith and Joy Behar interview

Kevin Smith talking about his recent 65lbs weight loss and what happened on that SouthWestern flight.

Just listen to the way Joy Behar cuts him up. His points are erratic but interesting. Also.. loads of ridiculous comments at the bottom of the page. Seems anyone with a computer is a medical genius! FAT IS BAD… MMMMKAY…. Moron! 

If he has lost 65lbs .. those Southwestern seats must be hugely generous if he says he didn’t spill over into seats when he was heavier. 

His points about the media switcharound on the meaning of his words, taking it as licence to be offensive is a point well made. But people/groups usurping the meaning behinds terms used to identify differing subcultures as a means to subjugate is well documented and with differing success. 

Where different cultures, countries, colours and achievers meet, you will find this. 

Video

Crystal Renn.... hear it straight from the horses mouth!!

Quote

“The man who views the world at 50 the same as he did at 20 has wasted 30 years of his life.”

—	Muhammed Ali

Kiss and Make up

SKIN

We are covered in the stuff, but before we go slopping stuff on with a trowel, we need to look after the icing on our cakes. 

I have normal to dry skin. I also have chemical burns on my cheeks (right side is worse) and therefore permanantly rosy cheeks. My biggest bugbear is dry skin, so this is how i take care of it:

Pat your face with warm water and exfoliate with Body Shops Facial buff, once a week. 

Cleanse and tone with Body Shops Vit E range. This stuff is INSANELY good, deep pores on my cheeks, dry patchs on my burns, colour variation, all evened out. 

When it comes to moisturising, if i need something light i’ll use Johnsons & Johnsons baby lotion or for something heavier, Nivea Creme.

Base

Two things i do here. For light wear, i just use No7 Intelligent Colour Foundation. I have pale skin, and this blends in beautifully. It is also SPF15 .. very important !! 

For a more complete look you can use a primer then your foundation. I add contoring by using a darker pigment powder, then finish by fixing the look with a translucent powder.

Eyes

As with your skin, you need to prime the area. A mini compact like this, is perfect! Cream gives a better finish than powder, but don’t go to heavy if you want a sharp look that will hold it’s own for hours. 

I hate liquid eyeliners with a passion. Go for a soft kohl pencil.. and for goodness sake make sure it is sharp, you dont want wood shards in your eye as you drag it along. Alternatively, wet a liner brush and pat it in the pigment of your choice. Dress it up how ever you fancy with colour and blending. 

Mascara is a must and if you want to wear Falsies, go for it, they are easy. Don’t shy from them but try not to wear 3 layers at once. Your a human not a babydoll. 

Lips

Red lipstick (corail des Mers) or a nude/apricot gloss. SIMPLE! 

Takes me about 10 - 25 minutes, if i have my game on! 

FOR SOME INSANELY GOOD MAKE VIDEOS LOOK HERE   X X X 

Feeling Frugal?

So i’ve provided links on good online retailers to get high street fat fashion. Now it’s cosmetics and perfume.

Fragrance direct - great UK site (does ship far and wide) with a wide variety of products from Bourjois lipsticks to Calvin Klein Foundation. Elizabeth Arden 8 hour Defence to Bio Oil. Standard delivery is just £1.99. Variety of huge savings. 

Feel Unique - Fresh looking site with familiar brands such as Neals Yard, bareMinerals, Nubar, Clarins, YSL and Elizabeth Arden.

Discount Cosmetics 4 u - Okay, the name is uninspired but they have a variety of higher brand cosmetics from favourites such as Stila, YSL, POP, Pixie and Benefit

A poem about me.. apparantly

“Sometimes you might snore in bed
and eat up all the food
but even with these imperfections
Torbag I love you :p xxxxx”

Tom

.. yes he calls me Torbag and no.. it’s not because it rhymes with something rude..

Come fly with me..... as long as u are thin and can fit!

So a week tomorrow i fly away on holiday with Tom, to see my parents for a few days over Valentines day.

(My folks live in Portugal and the idea was Toms.. i think my mum is convinced he is going to propose)

Anyway, I conquered my stupid fear of flying, last October when The Lord and I headed over to Portugal for a joint birthday present to ourselves and so he could meet my folks. I’d been scared of flying for years and to be frank, I didn’t get to see much of my parents because of this. 

Long story short, with the right person by my side, I LOVED IT.. i mean really LOVED IT.  

So now i am getting ready to jet off again and you know when i get my fat ass on board i will be hollering (nicely) for the fatty belly belt. (My size means i can’t sit in the front row as you’re not allowed to use the belt here but thats not too much both as u don’t get a window view.) 

Now before some muppet starts heckling about Fat Rights. My CHOICE is that i would rather land alive and in one comfortable piece than not being restrained properly when i needed to because i was trying to prove a rubbish point. 

So sit in the rows i do but as a big unit i do think about the welfare of my fellow passengers. 

If my bulging booty is creeping out into someone else seats, damn straight that’s not fair, they paid the same as me afterall and i am taking up their space. So why do so many fat men and women get the arse about it?

If you are to fat to fit in the space provided, you need more space.. er go.. you need another ticket.  And before you ask, no skinny people or children should not pay less just because they don’t take up the designated space. Ahh the magic word designated. 

“oh but they should make the seats bigger” … don’t be stupid. Airlines are a business, not a fat charity. If they make the seats bigger, the costs go up.Either way, you are going to pay for it. And why should the majority pay for the minority? The seats in low cost travel for most airlines i have flown, are totally reasonable. Long haul flights are normally even more generous. 

What concerns me, is that it is done with tact. Let the hippo on the plane first (think like Noah) and  let them try the seat in privacy before everyone else, like when they seat anyone else with special treatment. When doing so, have a member of their party sit with them. See if the two of them balance out. If they do. Job done, no extra ticket. If you are still packing too big and you’re going to cause discomfort to others, then ask them to buy an extra ticket or refund what they paid and don’t let them fly. 

Believe me, if you are encroaching on my space, for the ticket i worked hard for to pay for, I am going to have a problem with it. I am not flying 3 -9 hours in discomfort for anyone, other than a peanut -  melon sized baby which is inside me. Or because Tom is farting. Sadly it’s a biological pre-disposition for him.

Alas poor Torlilah.. we knew her well..

.. no you didnt, you drama queens! Mostly because i have not been around this past week. Apologies for that but it has been all go.

So, first things first.. i’m on my way to being a homeowner :D In the space of a year i have managed to acheive the 3 things i wanted above all others. 

1 - Get a promotion (and a pay rise)

2 - Have the chance to explore a relationship with Tom

3 - Get on to the property ladder. 

Getting into property in the UK is not easy unless u have a bloody good annual income, at least 15k and possibly a parental guarantor. I earn in excess of 25k, but living on your own is expensive. 

But finally.. i got here. Or should that be we. 

Yes, Tom and I are to buy our first home together and we couldn’t be happier. In fact, i have never seen Tom as loved up or happy as this. I guess it’s direction and an end to the being so far apart. 8 months in and so far, things have just got better and better. 

We all have dodgy relationships, i have had the works; the violent one, the lazy one, the insecure one, the flirty one and the one who should have been left at birth. Most have never been serious because i hold most people at a distance, including friends, but i think this is worth a punt. 

My parents have been together for 28 years and fell pregnant with me about 2 months after getting together.. so heck.. bring on the world of conveyancing, mortgage arrangements, removal companies and serious commitment. 

I AM READY FOR YOU!!

One ring to bind them ....

Marriage.                                      *watches all the men flee in horror….*

Now it’s not news that in Western culture, our viewpoint and respect of the institution of marriage has changed. You could argue this to the decline in religious upbringing, changes in gender roles, equality law, career hungry women.. in fact I’m sure there is an argument for it being the fault of global warming.  How about, we except that it is a part of all these but mostly our own greed.

Why greed? Well lets go through the points. We are faced with so many choices today, from the day we enter this world to the day we leave. The colour of your hair, fashion, education – what course, what subject, where to study -, health – what do I do to my body, where do I get my healthcare-, what is my sexual orientation and who you love are all choices that you can make freely.

But with choice comes responsibility, right? Not if you have so much choice that consequences become irrelevant. And with that ambivalent conundrum comes apathy and laziness.

Don’t follow?

Choices

You can choose not to get married but live together as a couple, maybe even raise children, this is legally known as cohabiting. (there is no such thing as Common Law Marriage, you are married or you’re not).

It’s no longer frowned on, nor is the need to have an heir to carry on the family name and fortune. Marriage doesn’t – in most western cultures – equate to the woman becoming property of the husband. Living in sin in a phrase found in the history books for most.

The expectation of taking your husbands name is not so relevant. The common folk even take to double barrelling surnames as a sign of equality, just as the high born families once did, to mark significant family unions and keep their legacy going.

Nope, nowadays you are free to procreate in any manner you see fit, want to be a single parent, go for it. Society won’t ostracise you anything resembling the social deaths that once occurred.

See, lots of choice, which in it itself is great but there are always consequences.

Responsibility & Consequence

So what about if the marriage goes wrong? You know, like it’s some sort piece of bread that has gone mouldy. Well you can divorce! You lucky dog you!! (there is no such thing as Legal separation, you are either together or you are not in the eyes of the law). Fingers crossed it all goes smoothly and in 16 weeks you can get a nice shiney Decree nisi. 

You now have 5 choices. Do you pick :

•       Unreasonable behaviour committed by your spouse.
•       Adultery committed by your spouse.
•       Two years desertion by your spouse
•       Two years seperation from your spouse with consent.
•       You have lived apart for 5 years, no consent is needed.

 Time to rinse and repeat? Well you can, because you can choose to remarry, many churches will even allow this or bless your union. Were you an adulterer? Don’t fear, unlike 60 years ago, your name won’t be posted in the local paper detailing your filthy shenanigans and your children won’t be removed by social services.

(yes this did happen)

Choices affords us an opportunity to ignore all sense of responsibility both emotional and maternal/paternal because it offers a selfish way out in the form of options.

Love

Oh but what of love I hear you cry. I am sounding to cynical right? Well if you love your partner and you are prepared to commit to marriage, that’s great. Of course it is. Nothing beats a heart warming sign of devotion after all.

de·vo·tion  (d -v sh n)

n.

1. Ardent, often selfless affection and dedication, as to a person or principle.

If it is an option and if you love that person enough to commit to them for life then you should be prepared to work hard.. I mean so hard that you feel you might physically break. That’s what you do for love.

You don’t up and leave because you think they are lying. People lie. Your partner cheats? Guess what, they do that too, physically and emotionally. They spend more time at work and not enough time with you, they take up hobbies and interests that may not involve you? What people aren’t allowed interests or personal space if they so chose?   

So you have a choice. Do you accept they are imperfect and that they are likely to do it again? Or do you choose not to put up with their treatment or behaviour and walk away in these situations?

(Domestic violence is another subject entirely and the emotional and physical risks are not on discussion here).

Conservation of angular momentum...

Or what makes my world go around for those not paying attention at the back… !

Obviously… I come first but not far behind me is Tom. Clothes, shoes, food and my bed factor in quite highly also. 

If you have any sense you will know that Long Distance Relationships are not easy. The lure of that person, the desire to have them with you, at yourside, is strong enough to tear you apart as much as it can hold you together. For now, a long weekend every fortnight suffices along with holidays together, with family and other important celebrations.

We have shared and risked a lot but we have also seen it been rewarded time and again.Trust and genuine old fashioned affection above all else. It’s not easy for him to be with someone as nuts, grown up, emotionally inquisitive and verbally incontinent. But he gets me. And i get him (more than he likes at times but he needs a strong woman and we both know it). 

It’s one of those ” i didn’t really think relationships like this were legally allowed” type affairs. You know, Disney might hold a patent somewhere and be planning to sue me. 

My perfect match is imperfect harmony. We keep each other on our toes. 

The Lord isn’t a chubby chaser, more of a Whale Trapper and anything else is our business.

I’ve seen other fatty’s try to emulate, trash or use ours as a relationshiptemplate. Which is daft, you can’t replicate a relationship and as MC Hammer said “you can’t touch this”.

It usually that woman’s lack of confidence which stops her from having her own love of a lifetime. If you are an overweight woman, who doesn’t believe that relationships like ‘that’ can happen to you. You are wrong. 

It does happen, it is precious and it is worth holding out for. 

All you need is love..... and a ADSL Modem with broadband connection.

We meet partners and lovers through all walks of life, pubs, clubs, parties, friends, work, online chat rooms, lonely hearts and other social interests. For most Brits, gone are the days of chaperones and in their place we are much more dependant on our friends for advice and consoltation on prospective lovers and partners. This can be achieved online without and at their leisure as they can reply to your IM when they next log in. Our social worlds are our debutante’s ball.  So we really can and do run our social lives online, when it suits us.

The first and foremost worry of anyone when it come to meeting someone from the worldwide web is what if they turn into Sweeney Todd. Get a grip, if at this early point they turn in to a raving loony, as long as you haven’t offered up to much personal information, you’ll be fine.  If you have offered up phone numbers, addresses, facebook details - where you have probably catalogued your whole life -… well quite frankly it’s your own bloody fault. Stop being a muppet and take your personal safety seriously.

I see it as really no different from meeting a person you thought was normal at the library and then turns out to be a book-reading bunny boiler. Or if you are a lesser being, you probably met them at the pub when you were scraping the coppers off the sticky floor.. or you were on drugs… in which case you better get to a GUM clinic.

No, the most significant danger of online relationships and internet dating is not that they may lock you up in a dungeon for 25 years (nice reference Tommington). It is that you are defrauding yourself out of any serious and honest relationship by the fabrication in your mind you have built of that person in the absence of their physical presence 

You can’t feel the timbre of their voice, the smell of their hand or the soothing protectiveness of their touch. So you embellish. You fantasise. If you don’t keep this in check, you will rush in heads first and as your dopamine levels return to normal, well… actually.. that person isn’t really worth the 8 hour round trips, petrol money and you hard earned free time. But you’ve already proclaimed your love.. and now you look like a tit..don’t you?

Similarly our silly minds are likely to make us walk away from the decent people, have some stupidly dramatic outburst or convince yourself they are leading a double life. Well, if you can’t put the hard work in now, how can you expect anything to last?

Nothing is easy, and internet dating and online relationships are certainly not that. They are designed to hurt, especially when mixed with a LDR. 

BUT… and this is a massive BUTT (much like my own)… when it goes right, there is no reason you can’t and won’t meet someone who could be very significant in your life. You just need to know yourself first, to not settle and be prepared to work hard. No relationship is easy and it is only by being tested, that you can be sure the love you have is real. Otherwise it could all be a one-sided affair.

Reblog From Tommington

The Internet - Sinner or Saviour?

Time for another topic that has randomly found its way into my head!

The Internet.

Two words that have pretty much shaped the world as we know it, fifty years ago, the thought that you could be having a slice of toast in a greasy spoon in London, and through a mobile phone, be able to see what your cousin in Canada had done the night before through something like Facebook, was seen as outlandish, insane, and in some ways, criminal.

But now, we can’t wake up without being bombarded with the internet, every television show, product, individual and place now has a Facebook, Myspace, Twitter, blog, website, or whatever else is out there, devoted to themselves. The number of shows on the television today that offer you the chance to see more by logging on, or emailing, or posting in a debate, is truly astounding, just count up how many times you see or hear it mentioned during tonight’s television productions, and you’ll get my point.

The thing is though, how bad is the internet, really? I mean, as a non-physical entity, it’s about the only thing on this planet that is not policed, not owned, cannot be taken away, and ultimately, cannot be destroyed (unless of course, something like The Matrix, or, Terminator happens to happen…in which case this blog I’m writing is entirely fictional, and entirely pointless…)

On the downside of course, we hear plenty of things about fraud, theft, internet pedophilia, any whatever else happens out there, but in my opinion, and I warned you I was opinionated in my first post, there is definitely a benefit to being online.

The biggest (no pun intended sweetie) benefit in my lifetime that came from the internet, was meeting my better half, without the internet, our relationship never would have started, let alone kept going! Now, before you discount this as one of those “weird internet relationships” that only exist between trolls that scour the internet chat rooms in an attempt to find someone stupid enough to believe the stolen picture they use on their profile, please give me the benefit of the doubt. Just over a year ago, I found myself talking to this girl on a website designed for those of us who like a girl with a bit more meat on her, Fantasyfeeder.com for anyone who wants to take a look, I’m not really there any more these days, but for anyone that is interested, it’s a useful site, even if the name is bit odd!

Over the next few weeks and months, we ended up chatting more and more, and eventually, met up, safe in the knowledge that neither one of us was likely to kidnap the other and chain them up in a small underground bunker for the next 25 years (although dear, sometimes I do wonder about you!). Finally, with a lot of detail, holidays, etc etc skipped out, turns out that I’m onto a winner with this one. It’s nice to meet someone who shares your opinions, but, as is so common with the Scots, she isn’t one to sit around and let me get away with anything that she sees to be wrong, not that I’m complaining or anything (please don’t hit me dear :P).

So there, in a very large nutshell, we have it, anyone want to comment on this one? Pro’s and cons of the internet? Your opinions, as always, will be very much welcomed!

Reblog from Tommington

Power chords, killer lyrics, and sticky reminders!

Hey there boys and girls, me again, here with hopefully another slice of intelligent and witty banter…well there has to be a first time for everything I suppose!

Not too much has been happening today, unfortunately, meaning that I’m rather short on stories and anecdotes, yet I feel something is needed up here today! So here it is, be prepared readers, or, if you’d prefer, aim for that little red “x” at the top of your screen…I will however, be very sad if you do!!

So, here I am, on my way back from work, about a twenty minute drive, fifteen if I’m a bit over-zealous with the right foot…although Her Majesty isn’t best pleased when I do it! (stupid speeding ticket >.<). Not really a great deal you can do whilst driving, apart from you know, drive, so I thought I’d peruse the airwaves, and see what was being played out today. After the usual drag through the veritable armada of radio stations on the hunt for something appealing, I hit upon an old classic, and for some reason, it hit a chord somewhere inside me.

The song itself of course, probably doesn’t mean a great deal to most people, but to me and the wifey, it means quite a bit, a little known ditty called “Six Feet Under The Stars” by an American pop-punk band called All Time Low. For those of you who are sat there trying to Youtube it up a notch in order to see if its any good, don’t worry, it won’t disappoint, and for those of you who have heard of this song, well I just found a new sense of respect for you!

Aaaaaanyway, let me get onto the whole point of this blog, instead of just mentioning an obscure song reference in an attempt to get attention. The reason I mention this, is because I’m fascinated by the ability of music to reach out through the airwaves, grab a listener by the vocal chords, and shake them until they’re about ready to burst! What is it about a song that makes you remember it? The event in your life where you heard it? The melody? The lyrics? Perhaps it just happened to be a really annoying tune and now you’re stuck humming it for at least the next 24-48 hours…kind of like a stomach bug really, you can’t help but regurgitate it at regular intervals.

Now, no two people will have the exact same tastes in music, there will always be a subtle difference, for example I am quite attached to the rock/punk related genres, you know, a couple of guitars, a drumkit, a few powerchords, anything of that ilk is enough to satisfy me. No matter where we go in life though, there are always those few songs that always get everyone’s attention, those classics that have survived the test of time, and are continuing to earn their writers a small fortune in royalties! This phenomenon is something that fascinates me, how people with broad-reaching music tastes, can still make a decision that one particular song is particularly amazing with its particular arrangement of a particular melody. Now then, the song above, for me, is a constant reminder of Toria (read previous post for the lowdown on the missus…part one! Trust me, she’ll be featuring plenty in this blog!), which is a useful thing when we live three hours away. It was one of the first songs that we both discovered together, and ended up liking, which was a pretty nifty thing for something that neither of us had either heard of before.

So then, I open the floor to any and all thoughts, what is it about a song that gets your attention? Let’s see what the world has to say!

Reblog from Tommington

Another day another dollar! (other currency forms are available)

Well here I am, I finally succumbed to this whole blogging..thing! At last I’ve seen enough of people with the IQ of a small Hungarian doormouse attempting to get their opinions of the world across without first considering their information sources, and decided I’d attempt to give the world a piece of my mind from the comfort of my own bedroom!

(If you havent gathered by this point, I’m a pretty opinionated son of a gun, so be prepared…I did warn you!)

So where to start…hmm…well I suppose a bit of background on me would be a useful starting point! Not too much to tell, which from a writer’s point of view is probably a bad thing, but for you, the lucky lucky reader, you get to avoid a 21 year marathon of the ups and downs of the life of Tommington!

Well, as I just said (stupid repetition), I’m a 21 year old guy, in the UK, the Midlands to be exact, for any other Brits who want to “big up” the area! Erm, I drive, I play the bass, I work…sadly. Job wise I’m not your typical twenty something, I haven’t gone through the degree route the normal way, instead I’m being paid for by my employer, and when I’m not hitting the books, I’m juggling test tubes (Not literally of course…the health and safety guys would go mad!) on behalf of a local laboratory…fun fun fun!

Not a lot goes on around me that I dont normally notice, and more importantly, have an opinion on, sadly most of these I end up having to keep to myself, but that’s the beauty of blogging, if I need to, I can hide behind an internet created facade, and ignore the comments (sound like any old dates any of you have had?)This somewhat annoying ability, is probably something that sets me up well for this blogging malarky, so hopefully, I’ll see some payback from it soon enough!

Now then, as I understand it, the idea here is to come up with something zingy, controversial, opinionated, and conversation-simulating, but I’m going to start off with something that seems to have been catching my attention for the past few days. Sadly, I live a 20 minute drive away from my work, and my girlfriend lives a good 3 hours away (I’ll get onto this in a minute, don’t panic noble readers!), which means I have plenty of time spent in the car to listen to the radio. Most recently, I’ve found myself tuning into Radio 4, there wil be time for mocking remarks at the end of this discussion thank you boys and girls, please rest assured that at least 25% of the time this is because there is nothing of a musical variety being played at the time that shouldn’t be listened to without being first placed in a soundproof room.

The hot topic I noticed tonight was a documentary of sorts on “Black, British, and Muslim”, which I happily listened to, although to be fair, it was rather dull in places. Anyway, this is not my point, what I am going to get onto, is the situation which was portrayed by the title. It seems once again, the unfaltering British desire to categorise and identify everything with, or into, a group, has even spread onto this most traditional of radio stations. The desire to stereotype or isolate individuals from society based on small areas of their personality is rampant, and to be fair, is not really necessary.

Case in point, my better half (that’s the only time anyone will catch me admitting to this!). Now then, I’m going to make it clear now, that the kind of woman which catches my eye, is most definitely not a Size Zero, flat chested bimbo with more artificial hair than a teddy. No, I am what some people, I suppose, might term a “chubby chaser” Now then, this does not mean I’m some mad nutter seeking a metric ton of a woman, as are so often portrayed on the television, no, these kind of people are in a league of their own. (A league that should be disbanded, quickly, with a 50 calibre rifle). However, just because a man prefers a girl who has actually heard of a cheeseburger, and knows where food is supposed to go, rather than living on a diet of rabbit food and lettuce, there are quite a few stereotypes that she apparently must conform to.

The apple of my eye, Toria, is not exactly small, as a size 22/24 girl, she definitely isn’t going to be appearing on a well known page of The Sun newspaper any time soon, however, she is, by no small margin (excuse the pun), the most caring, loving, devoted, and feminine person I have ever met. Although, if we are to believe the popular opinions, she should be, lazy, workshy, exhibit poor personal hygiene, and often be found stalking the bins of her local takeaway. And it started me wondering, why do so many people decide to stay addicted to these preset assumptions? We are all prone to make broad decisions about people, but most of the time, this just makes us look stupid.

I am not going to sit here and pretend that I never make assumptions on anything, nor do I not have the predisposition to make assumptions about people, but sometimes you really do need to question the mentality of individuals. Humans are, unfortunately, creatures of habit, and like most animals, which we all are at the end of the day, demonstrate a pack mentality. A lot of the time, these social decisions mean that everyone decides to agree with a decision just because it means they don’t stick out in a crowd. How many times have you thought someone was a rather good looking person for a quality you find attractive, but because you know your mates will probably have a dig at you, keep your gob shut and try to look the other way?

This is exactly the same situation, so from the local Wetherspoons pub, to the dizzying heights of topical BBC radio, there are thoughts that we can all too easily get away with this pack mentality that people are just another example of a stereotype, something we really should try to fight back against.

So here is my challenge to you loyal readers (hoping you haven’t already written me off as a complete *insert expletive here*), break one stereotype you encounter this week, see if you can catch yourself making an assumption, and slap your figurative wrist for doing it. You never know, you might just surprise yourself at how wide ranging our opinions of each other can be, if you just make the extra bit of effort!

Now its time for me to get some sleep, another day of work beckons….come on lottery win! Opinions, thoughts, questions, all welcome, just be nice, this is my first time afterall!